Captain Ahab - God Told Me To Become An Accountant

well i was very happy, in my cabin not a care
i lived up in the hills and no one knew that i was there
i built myself a boat and i'd go fishing in the lake
i'd never take more then i need or need more then i take

but then one day god spoke to me, he looked me in the eye
he said "hey steve get out of here, your life is but a lie
what are you doing fishing here and living in the woods
you should be trading potteries and taxing foreign goods"

god told me to become an accountant and who am i to disobey
god told me to become an accountant and who am i to disobey

and so i left my little shack and shaved away my beard
i pawned my bongo, sold my boat and lucifer a beard
he said "you're just a hippy and that's all you'll ever be
you can't understand accounting [?] by the sea"
well i said "now hear me satan i have served you far too long
i don't need your peace and harmony, your nature or your songs
no i crave the mighty taxes both direct and indirect
and not to mention all the leakages that i will now inspect cause

god told me to become an accountant so i cut my hair and went to school (yeah, thats right)
god told me to become an accountant so i cut my hair and went to school (uh uh)
god told me to become an accountant so i cut my hair and went to school
god told me to become an accountant so i cut my hair cause school is cool

well i applied to calstate to take a class or 4
i bought about a dozen books and then i bought some more
i took accounting 101 since this is one of two (?) and microeconomics which is very hard to do
i thought this time i doubted all these orders from the lord
through i knew it was god's will i began to get bored 
yo i slept through micro econ (?) did poorly on the test
but then god showed up again to guide me on my quest

god told me to become an accountant and this is what he said to me (can you dig it?)
god told me to become an accountant so i cut my hair and went to school (aww yeah  thats right)

"yo steve man persevere, be not afraid and shit you know
like you keep on working you bust your ass you'll get right to the top
you climb that aggregate demand curve man
it aint all that inelastic
soon in your mind you'll have like a big office man and like a fine wife and like some kids and shit man
cause all that comes to children of the lord"

even though i studied hard and buy and buy, got my degree, though i never figured out just what the hell was g&p
i started working at a firm and made alot of dough
i paid back all my student loans and bought a bungalow
i had a house, a dog, a TV and a wife, and i had a morgage payment too and not much of a life
i asked if i was happier down here in the woods then said "well its beside the point if god says that its good"

god told me to become an accountant so i cut my hair and went to school (yeah, thats right)
god told me to become an accountant and he saved my immortal soul
god told me to become an accountant and he saved my immortal soul

then satan reared his ugly head again to tell me more
he told me im not myself to become a holy whore
he said "you little baby, always doing what your told
if god told you to kill yourself you'd not be quite as bold (?)
you cannot trust the man above to always know what's best
he nailed his son to a tree because the brat was such a pest"

well i listened to the man in red and what he said was right
so i quit my job, went back to the hills and never saw the light

god told me to become an accountant but satan told me to be myself (that's right)
god told me to become an accountant but satan told me to be myself (yo, yo)
god told me to become an accountant but satan told me to be myself (yeah)
god told me to become an accountant but satan told me to be myself

god told me to become an accountant but i told him to go fuck himself
god told me to become an accountant but i told him to go fuck himself (yeah, that's right, sing it you robotic bitches)
god told me to become an accountant but i told him to go fuck himself (captain ahab in the house, yo)
god told me to become an accountant but i told him to go fuck himself (ya'll better watch out, man)